Lately I have been letting things out of my control get to me. The main two categories of these things include
1.) Others Actions
2.) Life events that seem "unfair"
I hate even writing number 2 because I absolutely hate the word "unfair" or ever saying "its not fair." I was raised to believe that those words should not exist in my vocabulary. However, as I looked more in depth at the source of my frustration, I have to say it came from that. I guess the solution to this is the same as always, focus on what is in my control and don't dwell on the rest. Even though we don't always see the immediate recourse of our actions, in the end working hard and doing the right thing seems to pay off.
As for number one, I really need to get a grip. I have really been getting caught up on past actions of people who hurt me, which is making it more difficult for me to move on. I know that I'm not a robot, which means I can't control my every thought, but I can keep myself from dwelling on things. I can keep work on not holding myself back. I can focus on the fact that I've learned from my mistakes and misjudgments and am living according to the lessons I've learned. The second kind of people that have bothered me are people whose actions are sub par, at least by my standards. I know it is absolutely ridiculous and hypocritical of me to say this after getting up on my soap box in my last blog about "living and let live" but hey, it happens. Its frustrating to find out people are being rewarded for bad behavior and can be discouraging when it directly affects you.
However, as someone wise once told me "don't worry about it, the cream will rise to the top." Maybe it makes me sound arrogant, but I just mean this in the general sense, not referring to myself in particular. People will be rewarded for their actions, good or bad.
On a more cheery note, life is going pretty dang good. I know it may be hard to believe from the vent session above, but don't let that fool you. I am so incredibly busy at work and after-work life I am struggling a little to balance everything. What's new, right? Luckily, this week I've slowed things down a bit so I primarily am just busy from work. I really like my job. I feel incredibly lucky to have gotten on a team with so much knowledge, and not only that, most of them are willing to share it with me. Even though sometimes they are the most frustrating parts, my favorite parts are the challenges and crunchtime deadlines that push me too my limits. Aaaannywhoo, that's all you guys get for now. I am completely and utterly exhausted, its time to hit the sack!